writer rachel, 21, art music literature architecture fashion philosophy

my website Cherchez Beauté

wishlist
Books I want
tree of codes - jonathan safran foer
six walks in the fictional woods - umberto eco
the separate heart and other stories - simon robson
generosity - richard powers
shades of grey 2 - jasper fforde
fiction ilustrado - miguel syjuco
mr peanut - adam ross
light boxes - shane jones
a void - georges perec
the mind's eye - oliver sacks
the fall - guillermo deltoro
bel canto - ann patchett
wolf hall - hilary mantel
my name is red - orhan pamuk
the misfortune - wesley stace
time's arrow - martin amis
darkmans - nicola barker

Skin Care I Want
Anne Semonin Eye Express Radiance Ice Cube
Benefit Ultra Radiance Face Re-hydrating Mist
Clinique Repairwear Intensive Eye Cream
Murad Essential C Eye Cream SPF 15
No. 7 Protect & Perfect Intense Eye Cream
Tokyo Milk - EVERYTHING. I want everything from them, darn it.

Make Up I Want
Amazing Cosmetics Amazing Anti-Aging Face Primer
Benefit Sugarbomb
Benefit Moon Beam
Canmake Cream Cheek Blush Sweet Apricot
Coffret D'or Shine Drape Rouge (Glow)
Le Metier de Beaute Creme Fresh Tint in Poppy
Tarte Amazonian Clay Blush in Blissful
YSL Pure Black Lip Gloss

Other Stuff I want

Nail Polish Lemmings
Essie Starry Starry Night
Chanel Ciel de Nuit
Clarins 230

a-england Lady of the Lake
BB Couture Dragon's Breath
BB Couture Napa Valley Red
Bb Couture Mendocino Midnight
BB Couture Redwood Forest and loads more BB Couture polishes...

Butter LONDON Black Knight
Butter LONDON Tart With a Heart

Color Club Untamed Luxury
Color Club Otherworldly
Color Club Scent-suous Gingerbread Man
Color Club Scent-suous Santa's Cinnamon
Color Club Scent-suous Sugar Plum Yum

China Glaze OMG! Collection

Cult Nails Hypnotize Me

Deborah Lippmann Edge of Glory Holographic top coat
Deborah Lippmann Call Me Irresponsible
Deborah Lippmann Forget You

Dior Exquis

Essie Geranium
Essie Strawberry Sorbet
Essie Swept Off My Feet
Essie Mademoiselle
Essie Marshmallow
Essie Mesmerize
Essie As Gold As It Gets
Essie Pure Pearlfection

Estessimo TiNS The Neo-Vintage Dress

Etude House BL009
Etude House WH004

Finger Paints Special Effects Asylum
Finger Paints Special Effects Twisted
Finger Paints Evergreen Dream
Finger Paints Sparkle Top Coat
Finger Paints Cordur Orange
Finger Paints Holly Good Times
Finger Paints Floatin' On a Cloud

Glitter Gal Marine Blue

Golden Rose Scale Effects: 2, 5, 11

HITS Lambada Flake
HITS Valsa Flake

Illamasqua Rampage
Illamasqua Boo! and Hiss Nail Pantomime Duo

Kleancolor Metallic Orange
Kleancolor Metallic Green
Kleancolor Holo Chrome

L'Oreal Owl's Night

Ludurana Aurora Boreal Reluz
Ludurana Aurora Boreal Emocionnante

Lynnderella (Llarowe stocks in January) Cauldron Drippings
Lynnderella Happy Holo-Daze
Lynnderella Gotta Love Brains
Lynnderella Bride of Franken

OPI Time-less is more
OPI DS Extravagance
OPI Diva of Geneva
OPI Jade is the New Black
OPI Can You Tapas This
Orly Galaxy Girl
Orly Lunar Eclipse
Orly Au Champagne
Orly Royal Velvet
Orly Meet Me Under the Mistletoe
Orly Happily Ever After

Ozotic 624
Ozotic 531
Ozotic 532

pa A19
pa Q24
pa A24
pa A134

Periphera - any polishes, especially the perfume enamels as I don't have these yet. From Korea.

Picture Polish Hypnotic (Coming out in 2012)
Picture Polish Vegas

Mavala Agena

Missha HGR01

Nicole by OPI Hard-Kourt Fashionista
Nicole by OPI Kourt is Red-y For a Pedi
Nfu Oh 51
Nfu Oh 52
Nfu Oh 56

Nubar Peacock Feathers
Nubar 2010
Nubar Swiss Chocolate
Nubar Sour Candy
Nubar Gold Feather
Nubar Greener
Nubar Indigo Illusion
Nubar WIldlife
Nubar Purple Beach

Rescue Beauty Lounge Recherche
Rescue Beauty Lounge Anne

Revlon Facets of Fuschia

Sally Hansen Nail Prisms Turquoise Opal

SpaRitual Golden Gleam
SpaRitual Howl

Zoya Casey
Zoya Adina
Zoya Kimmy


cool stuff
Style.com
City of Skies
Flickr
Spinner
Fashion Nation
Scrangie
Vampy Varnish
All Lacquered Up

credits maker
picture
brushes
blogspot
blogskins

Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Break before mortality catches up

I suppose my slacking doesn't warrant a break, but I will take one anyway just to say a few words on my current state of existence, which, I am happy to announce, is far from bleak.

---

This is the holidays, but I keep getting this feeling that I'm being shortchanged of my time! I know everyone has 24 hours a day and are free to choose how they allocate their time to their activities (even though some people busy with CCA/CIP/other events may disagree) but somehow it seems to me that time washes over me like a wave washes over the shore, leaving me slightly disorientated in its wake.

The morning always starts off with a great sense of hope stemming from the thought of the wondrous possibilities the day ahead could/would bring. I wake up relishing the idea of a meaningful and enjoyable day, free from school and other such activities that sap my time and energy. After a split-second pause in which I attune my consciousness to reality, I feel an unadulterated sense of bliss, as if all were right with the world and those in it. Trivial as it may sound, there's a simplistic joy to be found in just lying on my bed, in awe of the beauty of the morning sunlight as it illuminates and stirs hope in everything I see. I just lie there, dreamy and content, contemplating the nature of things and people, admiring the sunlight like it were the newest and most beautiful addition to nature...

It's usually my mother who snaps me out of my reverie. As soon as the spell is broken, the new-found wonder I had for sunlight and its beauty fades and is replaced by a dulling sense of the reality of work. Well... not entirely. There is still a lingering breath of fantasy, of mystical worlds far away and of the beauty in the world yet unnoticed by my eyes. And yet I have to remind myself quite firmly that I'd better get up and eat breakfast before noon creeps by. I jump out of bed and stretch energetically (and yawn contentedly). Then I proceed with the day's activities.

The first thing I do to get into the rhythm of the day is to check my computer for the progress of my downloads. Then, I let myself be distracted by some exceedingly interesting things on the Internet, such as blogs and other downloads. As soon as the clock chimes 11, I realise I haven't really done "anything", and hurriedly shovel my breakfast down my throat while attempting to finish reading the last of the Internet stuff.

Then it's bath time! Amazing how the morning passes so quickly, eh? Showers are part of a ritual to prepare myself for the horrors/tediousness of work, I swear. After my shower, I am refreshed and ready to start work! I sit at my desk. And try to decide what work I should do. I while away an hour or so deciding if Math or Geog takes more precedence today. THEN I start work in earnest.

Work usually only lasts for half an hour, as my parents are extremely enthusiastic about bringing me out for lunch, an occurrence that repeats every day. I reluctantly (who am I kidding?) stop work, change/bathe if I haven't yet, and follow them out for lunch.

We usually return home at 2pm. I decide not to delve right into my work at 2pm, and so, take a break by lazing around on the couch/having conversations with my parents about inane things. Break's over when I realise the swiftness of the passing of time. My second attempt at doing work/revising begins. I am usually successful until 4.30pm. Why that specific timing? 4.30pm just happens to be the time when the afternoon sun is soft and warm, not glaring like noon nor cheery like morning, but fuzzy around the edges. It induces symptoms of excessive yawning and an incessant desire to flop onto my soft bed and drift off into sleep, which I usually succumb to.

Upon waking up 1/2 hours later, I realise, with a creeping sense of dread, that I have not done much. 2.5 hours of work in the afternoon is an insignificant amount. Minus the time spent on distractions and that leaves me with a meagre 1.5 hours of solid work. By now, it is 6pm and the afternoon is about to make way for nighttime. I sigh and embark on my futile attempt at doing work for the third time.

Dinner comes at 7pm, and I have to part with my work (for the umpteenth time today). Dinner usually ends at 8pm, and with the addition of the time taken for me to wash my dishes and wipe the table, I'm only free at 8.30pm. Thereafter, I try to do work. Sadly, this spurt of energy only lasts as long as I'm not on the computer, which is NOT now. At 10pm, my brain processes start to slow down, and finally, at 11pm they grind to a halt. If I'm awake then, I'm either mindlessly filing notes or sorting notes or... resisting sleep for the sake of conversation. At 12am I realise the folly of my ways and feel slightly depressed at wasting a day on trivialities. I feel even more depressed upon contrasting my depressed emotional state with my euphoria in the morning. I decide to rid myself of such feelings by going to sleep. Ah, sleep is good, I think, as I relinquish the control of my body to my unconscious mind...

And thus repeats the cycle of my day, like a long Sisyphean tragedy doomed to play out until... well, the holidays end. I hate to say this, but school days are infinitely more productive. Though productiveness and enjoyment have an inverse relationship, sometimes it feels good to be productive. Oh no I'm turning into a product of society; striving for workaholism and even more productive capacity until    !! ... We were made to enjoy life. I try.

---

On hindsight, I realise it's ironic I'm complaining about the lack of work-time in this post, while it is precisely this post that deprives me from doing work. I suppose it is a subconscious attempt to delay work that needs to be done. And this realisation means that my break from Mortality is now over. No, I am not even trying to be vaguely philosophical or metaphorical; I have to get back to where I stopped at for Mortality, in the study of Population in Human Geog.

So much for doing work!

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